With a new Superman adaptation in the works, we look back on this touching interview with the children of Christopher Reeve.
There’s an image that often replays in Will Reeve’s mind. The youngest son of Superman star Christopher Reeve, whose only memories of his dad are of him in a wheelchair, gazed around their living room to see his entire family there.
His father, celebrating his 52nd birthday. His mother, Dana, who had just taken her first acting job since the equestrian accident which left her husband paralysed, with no sensory or motor function below his shoulders. And his two older siblings, Matthew and Alexandra (their mother Gae Exton was Christopher’s first great love).
“I was in seventh grade, and it was an otherwise unremarkable small birthday celebration,” Will tells The Weekly of his memory of that day on September 25, 2004. “There was a cake. We hung out. I tried to entertain everybody by being a goof, like I am. We were all together and basking in the love and joy and laughter that defined our life together forever. And that was our last time all together as a family. And while that is a profoundly sad statement to have to make, I remember it with joy and gratitude.”
A fortnight later, Christopher would slip into a coma before passing away, his body finally giving up the fight after nine gruelling years. And 17 months after that, Will’s mother Dana would also lose her life after being diagnosed with lung cancer.
But while some may have regrets of thoughts and emotions left unspoken when losing a family member, for the Reeve children, one great blessing was that – likely due to the circumstances of their father’s health – they had already said all those loving words out loud.
“One of the gifts we have, looking back, is we knew exactly how much we meant to each other,”
Alexandra says as the trio gather for our chat today. “We lived life and had our relationships with focus and intentionality. So, my God, I would give anything for another day, but that’s just because I want more time. It’s not because anything was left unsaid.”
How Christopher Reeve became Superman
Christopher D’Olier Reeve was born in 1952, the first child for journalist Barbara Pitney Lamb and acclaimed poet and scholar Franklin D’Olier Reeve. The marriage ended dramatically and acrimoniously when their son was just four years old. For the rest of his life, Christopher would admit to feeling displaced and uncertain of what home meant as he shuffled from one to the next while his parents remarried and had other children.
Although he excelled at school academically and was a natural sportsman, acting, he would say, was his way out of the pressure he felt to impress his charismatic father. Selected from thousands to attend New York’s famed Juilliard School in the early 1970s, Christopher was just one of two to win a place in the advanced program. The other? Robin Williams, who would become his lifelong best friend and an anchoring rock as the pair weathered both fame and misfortune.
The first came for Christopher in 1978. While producers of Superman were signing up A-list stars including Gene Hackman and Marlon Brando for the big budget film, they wanted an unknown to play their hero. With his chiselled jaw, piercing blue eyes and impressive 193cm height, the then 24-year-old certainly looked the part – especially after bulking up in the gym to fill out his fitted costume. But more than that, he tapped into an emotion and sensitivity that resonated with audiences worldwide. When Superman opened, it was a smash hit. And on his arm was the woman who had captured his heart shortly ahead of filming, British model agent Gae.
Fame finds Christopher
“Dad transitioned from being a very regular person to the highest heights of fame,” daughter Alexandra Reeve Givens says today. “It was a beautiful love story and relationship which lasted for nearly 10 years at this unbelievable time.”
With Matthew having arrived in 1979 and then Alexandra (or Alex as her siblings call her) in 1983, Christopher was determined not to repeat the past and have them grow up in a broken home. But, as we see in the new documentary Super/Man: The Christopher Reeve Story, life takes its own turns.
“My dad had a big issue – he would not commit,” Matthew muses in the film.
“Every marriage he had seen in his own life had failed … he had no experience with a healthy, long-term, committed marriage.”
The pair split in February 1987. Gae stayed in London with the children while Christopher returned to the US and enthusiastically took to the bachelor life. But mere months later he met actress and singer Dana Morosini. The deeply in love duo married in April 1992 and welcomed William two months later.
Dana helped heal tensions in the Reeve family, drawing Matthew and Alex close while also helping smooth the relationship with Gae. And she was, all three children agree, the anchor who held them all together after Christopher’s fateful accident on May 27, 1995.
Directors Ian Bonhôte and Peter Ettedgui weren’t the first filmmakers to approach the Reeve family about making a documentary. But their dedication to telling the actor’s story, warts and all, won them over for what will likely be the only time they – and those closest to Christopher, including Gae – will share their entire story along with intimate family home videos.
“We knew about Chris, his accident and all those elements,” Ian tells The Weekly. “But very quickly we realised that the film wasn’t about Superman and it wasn’t about being an actor. It was about family, love and legacy.”
Christopher Reeve as a father
Christopher was an adrenaline junkie who enjoyed pushing himself to the limits. As well as horse riding, he was a keen skier, sailor and tennis player. He’d also acquired his pilot’s licence, flying twice solo across the Atlantic.
“One of my favourite and happiest memories of Dad was in his flying days,” Matthew says. “Me sitting in the co-pilot seat next to him as he was operating this aircraft and teaching me about what all the different dials and instruments meant. It was just so magical and special as a child.”
“Getting to see the footage of everything Dad did before I was born was a real treat,” Will adds of watching the finished film. “I missed the Superman years. Much of my life with him, he was in a wheelchair. So to see him in full flight, as it were, was a real gift to me.”
When he shot to fame playing the Man of Steel, Christopher would joke about taking extreme care not to put himself in danger’s way. He didn’t want to see a headline saying that Superman had been hit by a school bus. A fall from a horse wasn’t something he predicted, far less that it would make his legacy an entirely different one than that of a movie star.
Had the impact on his head occurred a fraction to the left, he would have died instantly. A fraction to the right, he would have dusted himself off and walked away. Instead, he was given a 50 per cent chance of survival. He flatlined repeatedly and required extreme surgery and an extensive recovery. This must have been completely terrifying.
Yet for Christopher, who had already used his early career as an activist for environmental and human rights issues, it became a period of introspection and then action.
Becoming a disability advocate
“He was honest about being far from perfect,” Alex says of what she’s learned of her father’s journey. “About having a human life with ups and downs and moments that were difficult; about living a celebrity life and then the shift in priorities that came … after his accident.
“His story is more powerful because he was far from perfect. He was a very relatable person going through this unbelievable journey and coming out stronger on the other side.”
At the time of Christopher’s accident, says co-director Peter, “spinal cord injury and a lot of disability related to medical situations were just doom and gloom. There was nothing much happening. Researchers weren’t interested in it because it wasn’t very glamorous and the thought of any success was so remote. Christopher would completely shift the needle on that in a dramatic way.”
As Christopher faced his future – permanently hooked to a breathing apparatus, unable to perform even the simplest of tasks by himself – he began reading everything he could about stem cell research.
“It was an abiding obsession for him because he felt this was the thing that could change the game completely,” adds Peter.
As Superman, he’d been the embodiment of a hero. But it was his work thereafter that would cement his legacy as one.
A new kind of hero
Christopher’s first public appearance after his accident was at the 1996 Academy Awards. He was greeted on stage by a standing ovation and plenty of tears from the crowd.
“What you saw at the Oscars was him putting himself out there as a disabled man,” says Peter of the significance of the moment. “He knew he could harness that reputation, go on to the most watched television broadcast in the world and show what it’s like – and that he is still him.
“Around that, he built a legacy of activism and of advocacy, pushing scientists and doctors on one hand and politicians on the other to release the funding.”
To that end, the Christopher Reeve Foundation (later renamed the Christopher & Dana Reeve Foundation after Dana’s passing) was established.
“He was always just Dad,” says Matthew of the new type of hero role his father embraced. “But then, after the accident, to watch him find this strength and resilience, to persevere and embrace this role as a voice for a whole community who didn’t previously have one? He led by example.”
The legacy Christopher Reeve left his children
At home, he was also changing the way he parented – learning how to be an active observer rather than an active participant, and opening up to his children about his foibles.
“I idolised my father and still do,” says Will. “He was my hero and role model for the way he loved and respected my mom. The way he valued hard work and discipline and kindness and equitable treatment for all people. For his penchant for stupid dad jokes … and for always being emotionally available for me. For supporting me and making me feel safe. And for doing all the things that a good father, in my estimation, does for a child … That’s why he’s my Superman.”
Perseverance was something Alex learned from her father and stepmother alike. “One of the gifts Dad and Dana gave us was to be honest when times were hard and to let us see that journey. Things may be difficult. There are things we are working through. But you take that journey up and go on to live another day.
“That’s how you raise resilient kids. It’s not creating an artificial bubble. It’s allowing them to realise that life is complicated and difficult, but strength is being able to persevere through it. And the way you do that is being there together as a family.”
Following Dana’s passing in March 2006, Alex and Matthew joined the foundation’s board of directors. Will is now on that board with them. The foundation has gone from strength to strength, raising an incredible US$140 million for spinal cord injury research, which has affected the therapies that continue to impact people’s lives to this day. It’s also built a community of those fighting for equal rights and provided access to opportunity for people with disability.
“I think a hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles,” Christopher said after his accident. And certainly his three children, who have gone on to continue his incredible mission, are living testament to that statement.
Super/Man: The Christopher Reeve Story is available to rent or buy via streaming services.
This article originally appeared in the December 2024 issue of The Australian Women’s Weekly. Subscribe so you never miss an issue.
