Sissy Spacek is finding it tough to say no right now. And that’s lucky for us, as it means she’s agreed to a chat over Zoom from her home, where she reveals this stage is part of the regular swings and roundabouts of the approach she takes to life.
“Sometimes I’m in a ‘no’ phase,” the Oscar-winning actress explains. “I just say no to everything. But just recently, I’m going through a ‘yes’ phase and I’ve been very excited.
“Mainly, I’ve been saying yes to my grandchildren. I have two – a four-year-old girl and her five-year-old brother. They’re just so entertaining and precious, so I’m enjoying them and spending a lot of time with them. And then I’ve been working a lot.”
First work cab off the rank in her latest ‘yes’ phase was a role in Disney+ drama Dying For Sex. Starring Michelle Williams (“we kind of have a girl crush, we still do,” Sissy says), the darkly humourous series is inspired by the real-life story of Molly Kochan. After being diagnosed with terminal breast cancer, Molly left her husband in order to explore her sexual desires, starting a podcast and finding herself in the process.
“I only read two scripts and I loved them,” Sissy says now of her immediate ‘yes’ reaction to playing Molly’s mother, Gail. “It moved me. I’ve been through loss in my life, as many people have or will. I just found it so authentic and funny and real. And the main reason I wanted to do it was because of Michelle Williams. I’ve been a huge fan of hers since she was just a teenager. And she was even more amazing than I thought she would be. Watching her work was just wonderful.
“Acting is a real process. It’s a practice. I wasn’t surprised at how easy she made it look, Michelle. She really brings things up from her solar plexus and from her heart and from her gut. She’s just spectacular.”
Not that Sissy is any slouch herself. Having seared herself into the public psyche with her role as Carrie in the cult 1976 horror film of the same name, Sissy has continually won praise for her complex performances on both the big and small screens. As she settles in to talk to The Weekly, she reveals how close she came to turning down that iconic role, as well as opening up on topics ranging from friendships to the art of practising gratitude.
Congratulations on Dying For Sex. It’s deservedly getting a lot of rave reviews…
I went to the grocery store yesterday and as I was walking in, a woman came running over to me, probably in her 50s, and she said, “Oh, I just finished Dying For Sex and I wanted to tell you how much I loved it. I’m a palliative care nurse, and I’m always so interested to watch things that are about people facing death. It was so real; it was funny. It was just what it should have been.”
And it also celebrates the bond of female friendships through Molly and her best friend Nikki (played by Jenny Slate). Have you got those unwavering friendships in your own life?
Oh yes, I have. I have a group of women who have been my friends for 45 years. We’re a little pack and very, very close. It’s a wonderful thing.
Our female friends play such an important role in our lives. It’s a relationship we don’t get elsewhere.
I think you’re right. There’s something sacred about our deep, deep friendship. I moved from California to Virginia in the ‘70s. [Sissy and husband Jack Fisk moved to a farm in Charlottesville to start a family.] And I was so lonesome for my girlfriends. I read somewhere that it takes seven years to make a really good friend. And I was so devastated. I went, “I don’t have seven years. I need it to happen sooner!” But doesn’t time fly by? Now I have friends all over the country, all over the world, thanks to social media and travel and all those things.
There are so many themes that resonated. One being that, as women, we feel ‘selfish’ for doing things purely for our own pleasure. At heart, so many of us are innately people pleasers. Do you relate to that?
I hadn’t thought about that actually, but since you bring it up, I think that’s a very common thing for women to always put themselves last. And certainly Molly was doing that.
Speaking about time going in a flash, we’re coming up to the 50-year anniversary of Carrie’s release.
I was thinking about that the other day, and it just made me laugh because that was when I was sending scripts to my parents. I said, “What do you think about this?” And they wrote back after reading it, and they said, “We don’t know about this one. This one’s kind of odd.”
You know, it could have gone either way. But I was in such capable hands with Brian De Palma, who directed it. And it was a wonderful cast. It just was one of those times when everything came together and everybody did their best work.
And it’s inspired many more adaptations on both stage and screen.
That’s such a wonderful homage to Stephen King’s story. And I think it’s important on a lot of levels, especially for teenagers.
All of us, when we were teenagers, felt sometimes on top of the world and sometimes just very low and like everyone hated us. It’s a very dramatic time in a young person’s life, and Stephen King really hit a chord with that story. It’s about abuse and about bullying.
These were things that really hadn’t been talked about. Now, every Halloween when Carrie is screened again, there’s a whole new batch of teenagers and pre-teens who are having that rite of passage, so there’s always an audience for it.
You were in your mid-twenties when you shot Carrie, and you’re still working steadily at 75. Was there ever a time when you worried where the next job was coming from? Or have you felt fortunate to continue to receive great offers?
Well, both those things. But that’s kind of the nature of the beast with any type of artist. You never really know where your next project is coming from. It takes a certain kind of person to deal with that, but I’ve never looked back. And I didn’t work constantly. Usually, I did one film a year – maybe two sometimes – and it really worked out great. I feel so grateful that I stumbled into this career. I wanted to be a musician, which is another career that’s hard to sustain.
Tell us about those early years in Hollywood.
It really was a beautiful decade, the 70s, in terms of film. It was a director’s medium in those years. The director had all the power, which is where you want the power to be, and we’re the troops. I got to ride that wave. It was just a magical time for me and for my husband, whom I met on Badlands (1973), a wonderful film that Terrence Malik wrote and directed. Jack and I worked on so many films together, and we’re both still working.
What are your two girls up to these days?
Oh, they’re just wonderful. My oldest daughter, Schuyler Fisk, is the mother of the two little precious children that we’re all so close to. She’s a musician and she’s recording and doing really wonderful. She’s not touring now because she’s got a Hallmark series called The Chicken Sisters that she’s starring in.
My younger daughter, Madison Fisk, is a very talented artist, and she’s having shows, selling work and working in her studio. She has a horse and she rides a lot. She paints and sculpts and shows, and rides. And she’s happy. We all kind of came home during the pandemic, and we are all still here.
You and Jack recently celebrated your 50th wedding anniversary. Congratulations!
Oh, it was wonderful. We remembered it. Our 20th wedding anniversary we forgot. We missed it; it was a month earlier. I can remember, as a young person, hearing people talk about, “Oh, 20 years ago I did this,” and I thought, “Whoa, they are old.” So 50 years, I mean, where does the time go? I tell young people, it goes fast. Watch out, do everything you can to slow down time. Grasp every opportunity.
You’re certainly doing that. Next up is Die My Love, which just premiered at Cannes.
Jennifer Lawrence produced and stars in it with Robert Pattinson, and Lynne Ramsey is the director, who is Scottish and very talented. That was just a wonderful experience. So, I have no complaints. I’m a walker and I take gratitude walks – that’s what we call them – with my girlfriends, and we count our blessings. I have a lot of blessings to count on that trail.
What would you be grateful for today?
Oh, that I’m able to walk as far as I want, that I’m healthy. That I am still working at 75 and in fun, wonderful projects with the best of the best. Michelle and Jennifer are just the best of the best. I’m really grateful for that.
And I’m grateful for my family, I’m grateful for my friends, I’m grateful for my community. Mostly, I’m grateful for the things that we’re all grateful for. It’s the little things, the little details. Having a cup of coffee on the porch early in the morning and watching the sun come up. Working in the garden and playing with my grandchildren. I’m grateful for all my little animals. What are you grateful for?
I’m grateful for speaking with you, Sissy Spacek! I’m grateful for the beautiful patch of the planet I live on. And I’m grateful for all the work that’s been done before me to make my life easier. For the trailblazing women who have allowed me the opportunities I now have.
I think I agree with you. For everything that we experience, there’ve been people who have come before us who have made things easier for us. And I’m grateful for all the people who have inspired me.
Anyone in particular?
Jane Fonda has been a terrific inspiration. She came around at that Barbarella time [1968] and she became someone who was so involved with women and families and really, a wonderful artist, just really fantastic. I get such a kick out of her. I don’t know how old she is, but she’s timeless, she’s just such an inspiration.
Stream Dying for Sex on Disney+ from $15.99/mth. SUBSCRIBE HERE.
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