TRIGGER WARNING: This article discusses weight and eating disorders. Reader discretion is advised.
In her highly anticipated Netflix documentary, Victoria Beckham has shared insight into her past struggles with an eating disorder.
The docuseries released on October 9, going behind-the-scenes at Victoria’s life as Posh Spice, a business owner, and more.
But it was her confessions regarding her weight and eating disorders in her younger years that has startled many fans.
“Was I fat? Was I thin? I don’t know, you lose all sense of reality. I was just very critical of myself. I didn’t like what I saw. I have been everything from porky posh to skinny posh, I mean, it’s been a lot and that’s hard,” she said in her three-part documentary.
Victoria, 51, recalled the first time she was body shamed as a teenager in theatre school.
But the comments only worsened as she got older and was constantly in the public eye after joining the British girl group, Spice Girls in 1994. Victoria confessed to starving herself to stay thin. A secret she told no one, not even her family.
“I had no control over what was being written about me or the pictures that were being taken and I suppose I wanted to control that. I could control it with the clothing, I could control my weight. I was controlling my weight in an incredibly unhealthy way.
“When you have an eating disorder you become very good at lying. And I was never honest about it with my parents.
“I never spoke about it publicly, it really affects you. When you’re told constantly you’re not good enough. And I suppose that’s been with me my whole life.”
The mother of three recalled when she was weighed on television in 1999, just six months after giving birth to her first son Brooklyn.
“We laugh about it and we joke about it when we’re on television. But I was really, really young, and that hurts,” she said.
But her friends and bandmates, Mel B, Emma Bunton, Mel C and Geri Halliwell made her “feel more lighthearted” and “good enough.”
It is this message that Victoria wants to instill in her daughter Harper, 14.
“I tell Harper everyday, be who you are,” she said.
If you or someone you know has been affected by any of the issues raised in this article, help is always available. Call The Butterfly Foundation’s national helpline on 1800 33 4673 or visit their website.
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